Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Conversations about work that go nowhere (aka mostly all of them)

Conversation with public school teacher scenario #1

Me: So, you're a public school teacher?

Her: Yes

Me: Are you some kind of idealist, trying to CHANGE KID'S LIVES?

Her: hehe, yeah I try to do that.

Me: ...

*Crickets*

Conversation with Public school teacher scenario #2

Me: I hear it's always a couple of trouble makers who bring the rest of the class down.

Her: Yes.

Me: I'm gonna go get another beer.

Conversation with school teacher scenario #3

Me: So you're a public school teacher? What grade?

Her: 7th grade

Me: Oh man, that's the worst, isn't it?

Her: Definitely, I have one student who just jumps around the room bouncing on furniture. He's too big, so I have to bring in another teacher to restrain him.

Me: That sounds awful. I guess that's public schools for you.

Her: It's a Charter School.

Me: Oh yeah?

Her: Yeah

Me: ...

Her: ...

Me ...So, do you watch The Wire? They have a good season about schools.

Her: No.

*Crickets*

Conversation between two guys in marketing

Me: I'm in marketing.

Guy: So am I.

Me: ...

Guy: ...

Me: ...

Guy: ...

Me: You go first.

Conversation with guy in PR:

Me: What do you do in your position?

Guy: Write press releases, develop communications materials, maintain client relations, coordinate events.

Me: *Woken up by startling noise in the background* Oh...Yeah? I hear there's a lot of girls in PR.

Guy: It's pretty sweet; about a 70/30 ratio.

Me: THAT'S ALL I EVER NEEDED TO KNOW, DUDE! *heartlily slaps back*

Me, Ryan, and seemingly every one of our Philly guy friend's conversations with girls at the Philly Art Museum:

Guy: So where do you work?

Girl: Philadelphia Art Museum

*begin tearing each other's clothes off. Start relationship/fling/rebound hook-up that ends in heartbreak/mutual split that turns partisan/marriage.*

Editor's note: Welcome men, to the local 47 Dater's Union of Philadelphia Art Museum girls. Please contribute 100 dollars in dues to the monthly brunch fund. Bear in mind that although I have 99 problems, I never worked in the museum, and the two girls that I got involved with had left/were leaving the museum at the time of start-up. My 100th problem, therefore, does not concern that of a female who currently works at the PMA. Nonetheless, I empathize with you, son.

Conversation about work that turns to discussing Internet surfing at work:

A heartfelt, flowing, humorous and dynamic conversation follows that touches on all aspects of the human condition.

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