A Coffee Shop? The Last Drop

Cracked walls? Old-timey lamp? Solitary figure? Dozens of useless fliers?

I guess we're talking about a coffee shop. In this case, it is the Last Drop, which actually looks nothing like the picture I just posted.

The Last Drop, located at 1300 Pine street, is one of the best coffee shops in Philly. I've enjoyed everything I've had there. There's only one problem: I don't particularly care for coffee shops.

First things first; Coffee. It has one primary ingredient, caffeine.

"blah blah this coffee is better than that coffee blah blah Colombian supremo". Listen, I know people are gonna disagree with me, but coffee is simply a conduit for caffeine. No matter what the quality of coffee or espresso is, will wake you up to a certain extent and then start producing diminishing returns.

Quality of coffee to me is pretty much defined by this: Does it have enough caffeine in it? That's why I typically choose a no-frills triple shot of espresso to go with my 300 dollar Alan Edmunds shoes. Both say one thing: Feigning power.

It's only 200 words into this post and I've already used about 15 colons.

It is fitting that weed in Amsterdam is sold in what are called 'coffee shops'. In the end, the two drugs are remarkably similar; not in the actual effects per se, but in the ways they are packaged and the ease in which an average person can consume the drug daily without real consequence. In the end, however, it doesn't matter if it's northern lights, AK-47, beasters, Italian roast, or a white chocolate mocha. They will all leave you with a headache and a propensity to do something completely irrelevant to what you need to be doing.

One time in England in the 1700s, some asshole drank so much coffee and had such big headache, he went off and wrote this ridiculous poem called "Rape of the Lock".

Anyway, the other uses of coffee shops include a place to socialize, read, or use a laptop. I have nothing against this concept; it actually seems pretty great in theory. The only problem is that I never see anyone socializing.

Which brings me to my next point: Without fail, every female says it's best for guys to meet girls at coffee shops. Until they start serving alcohol at coffee shops, however, this is asking for a hell of a lot.

All kidding aside (haha, "kidding"), I have one question to my female readers: How many guys have YOU met at coffee shops?

Let's just face the gritty reality. When guys and girls meet, a bar is somewhere in the early equation.